Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Randomize
