i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
