Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize