he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
