the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Randomize
