You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
