yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Randomize