Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Randomize
