My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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