how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Randomize