theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
