I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
