You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Randomize
