FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Randomize