Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
