Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
