Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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