I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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