Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Randomize
