Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Randomize
