He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
