I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
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