didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
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