Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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