Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
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