I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
