i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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