Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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