google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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