I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
