there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
