I'm going to jail i love you
I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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