His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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