its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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