I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Randomize
