Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Randomize