She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Randomize
