I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Randomize
