a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I came so hard my ears popped.
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