Taylor Swift is so right about you.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
