if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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