ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Randomize
