I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
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