6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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