omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize