Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
two words...techno handjob
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
the liver wants what the liver wants
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
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