Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
