I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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