I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Randomize