cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
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