she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
